From someone who has been stalked like 4 times, abused for years (but never brutally assaulted as you were), the comment you're referencing was ignorant at best and just plain mean at worst.

Like you, I shrank. I shrank from a balls to the wall, confident chick to someone that literally, and I do mean literally, couldn't go out. I'd go into full blown panic attacks if my phone rang unexpectedly or if the doorbell rang. I'd be standing in a mall and just the sheer strain of "people-ing" was enough to send me into a panic filled rage and I'd have to leave.

There is no lesson. There is no blessing. None of it should have happened in the first place. Not everything in life has some profound spiritual meaning. Sometimes people, and their actions, and where that leaves us just fucking sucks.

It's been at least 4 years since my last stalker and 0 years since I left my abusive ex, and I'm still not over it. I'll never be over it. There is no over it. There's just pushing through and trying to find healthy ways to cope. I still trust no one. No one at all, except my current husband. I doubt I ever will and I've come to be okay with it.