Girl, I feel you! You know my background by now, but the holidays are a huge trigger for me too! MY parents were Depression Era Blacks. My father, when he had a good paying job with the Canadian army, went hog wild givjng his kids EVERY DAMN THING. There wasn't a toy I didn't have. Khow what we didn't have though, savings or a home we owned. I had to pay my mother's care home bills for the last 12 years of her life. And to this day, I can't ask for a gift for myself, but damn, if I don't feel the pull to give my family every damn thing the ever mentioned.

I really think there's a generational trauma, a cellular memory with us, we know depreivation, we know what is it not to have, so we buy in the moment for those that we love. It's not conscious really, it just is.

I'm trying to fight against it, to build wealth instead of just getting stuff, but, it's so hard.