Speaking as a woman, we just want authenticity. You don't have to pretend to be some feminist, we don't want you to be hilarious all the time, we don't really care if you can bench press 300 pounds.

I've had the hot guys. I've had the so-called nice guys. I've had the doormat that wanted only to please me. None of it worked. You know what worked, honesty, authenticity. I reconnected with a former flame. He was fat (like closing in on 400 lbs), but cute, but he was engaging, intelligent, had enough of an edge to challenge me and most of all, he was real, he was always his true authentic self. 8 years later, we're happy as clams.

Women aren't stupid, we see past most of the gimmicks. We're not impressed by them.

Loved your story.