The duck lips thing bugs the shit out of me! That said, I disagree on the gender identity thing. To my mind, even if I don't full understand it, it costs me nothing to respect a person enough to address them the way they wish to be addressed. I think if we all just started there, it would pave the way for increased understanding.

As for the narcissistic obsession with self, guess who's fault that is? It's us that raised them, hovered over them, insulated them from anything and everything, etc.